Day Twenty-one

Where is my focus?

When I was training for a marathon, my training schedule called for one 'long run' a week. Long runs are so unpredictable. You can start out feeling great and then just suddenly 'hit a wall'. The wall can be caused from lack of planning--not allowing time for adequate digesting of food, for example. It can also be caused by just pure physical problems such as cramps, pulled muscles or shin splints. Other times, you just hit a wall for no apparent reason. I think these are just simply 'mental'. So much of running comes down to your 'mental game'. When I hit these walls, the only way I ever recovered was to refocus my thoughts. Halfway through my long runs, I began carrying scripture cards. When my mind would start to weaken, I would start praying scripture. Wow! This made a huge difference! I also began to shift my prayers to others rather than the 'me' prayers of 'give me strength, help me not be weary...' Refocusing worked; it worked every single time. It worked because I quit relying on myself and began relying on God. It worked because it quit being about me and started being about Him and others.


As I have been learning how to cope with 'the wall' in my training, I've thought about how much 'the wall' affects my daily life. I want so much to live my life focused on God first, others second, me last. Just like my runs, I can start off well. I get up and spend time with the Lord--I get filled up with Him with the hope that what I get filled with will flow out on those around me throughout the day. Just as physical 'training' is making me stronger to run a marathon, my daily time in God's Word and prayer is 'training' me spiritually to think and be more like Jesus. Starting the day off with God at the forefront is a great plan and gets that mentality of 'God first, others second, me last' in order. However, somewhere along the way--sometimes even early on in the day--my mind shifts and these priorities change. 'Me' starts to creep up to the front. I hit the wall--the wall of 'Me'. I have found the wall of 'Me' to be the biggest challenge of my life. The wall of 'Me' disguises itself in all different ways, including what I have began to call 'emotional tizzies'. I can get worked up into an emotional tizzy in no time flat. And then my mind can become consumed with it. I've realized that I have to refuel my mind throughout the day with God's Word, not just in the morning. I've got to reframe and refocus my mind moment by moment. Just as running a marathon is a moment by moment battle, so is life. I don't want to be stuck behind the wall of 'me'. I want to climb it and conquer it through God’s supernatural strength.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Forgive me for my selfishness, for far too often getting stuck behind the wall of ‘me’. Lord, I want to please You by putting others first. May I do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit but in humility consider others better than myself (Phil. 2:3). May I not be conformed to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of my mind. Then I will be able to test and approve what Your will is—Your good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans: 12:2). May I spend my life for You, on You, for others, on others.. Lord, please do a supernatural work in us all at Deeper Still. Show us what a Christ-centered life looks like. Rather than listening to the world’s mantra: ‘If it is to be, it is up to me,’ may we all be filled with Your mantra: ’If it is to be it is up to Thee!’ You are Adonai-Jehovah, the Lord our Sovereign. You are in control of all things. May we rest secure in that. ‘Sovereign LORD, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you (Jer. 32:17).’ Do a mighty, powerful thing in the hearts of women on June 10-11.

In Jesus’ name I pray,
Amen.